Off the Map

Perpetuating American Stereotypes

This is something I wrote a bit ago, before I had net access:

9/12/04

I really should start keeping track of all the ways I perpetuate the negative American stereotypes. We’ll start off on a “to be expected” note: Whenever I end up with my SA crew out around the town, eating, drinking and having lots of fun in a fremde Stadt (foreign city), we naturally end up loud. Any good Ami (American) would be loud, right? So you have a group of 5 to 12 Americans being pretty loud in the street, whilst most of the Germans are walking around speaking reservedly amidst themselves. Strike One.

Strike Two: Jason (the other SA kid in my complex) and I decided to check out the sporting facilities on campus. Being students of this Uni for a year, we figured it’d be ok. So we found the building, walked in and explored. A staff member even unlocked a mini-gym for us to shoot some hoops in. Everything went pretty well once we figured out the complex layout of the building. Once satisfied that we had covered everything, we walked out. But on the way, some 50 year old German with a heavy Bavarian accent stopped us and asked us for our Ausweisen (id's). Of course we didn’t have any (apparently the gym is an extra fee, if you want it), and no one stopped us on the way IN to ask us, so we mumbled something in German about it being our first time, not seeing the entrance sign, and quickly shuffled off. He was pretty pissed. :-)

The Third Strike involves only me, unfortunately: A few days ago I borrowed some bike tools from a student on Jason’s floor in order to get the old, French-made road bike I inherited into riding shape. The day after that, I was pretty tired, it was around 10:30PM, and I was walking down a dim stairway to the computer lab. I saw some Germans happily talking in the hallway, so said hi, and thought I recognized the guy who lent me the tools. So of course I thanked him and let him know it was a success. Turns out that wasn’t him, but some random German who lives elsewhere. Oops. But it gets better! -

- I started talking to them for a min or two, when one of them turned to the other and said something about “Hans und Franz” (in that order). Hans un Franz! Saturday Night Live, baby! These Germans know their stuff! So I thought. I excitedly jump into the conversation asking if they were talking about one of the skits. They just look at me blankly. Still feeling awkward from my first mistake, I hurtle myself quickly into another. I proceed to explain the premise of Hans und Franz, act it out for them, and try to make a joke about stereotypes. All of this was auf Deutsch (in German). By the time I was done making a total ass of myself in this stairwell, I had gotten a chuckle out of them, but mostly confused or awkward looks. I quickly bid them a good night, and flew down the stairs to check my email.

You've got to give me some credit though - at least I KNOW I'm messing up...

posted by Jason @ 9:32 pm